7 April 2005

Good advice

In an effort to make Pumpkin Soup a more interesting and useful resource for the many hundreds of you (!) that have contacted me for advice, I have decided to start a new category that will enable me to pass on useful tips gleaned from bitter experience so that you can avoid the embarassing errors I have made.

Here’s something to get you started.

Do respect the SSSI (Site of Special Spider Interest) that houses the allotment toilets by leaving it in the condition in which you find it. A clean, well-maintained loo would not provide the very specific conditions that these glorious (no, they’re really not hideous and terrifying, honest) creatures require in order to thrive in the remarkable numbers that we can see here. Dirt and stains (please, don’t think about what kind of stains) on the seat and floor all help maintain the delicate ecological balance (no need to sit down - just hover above!) in this unique micro-climate. We also recommend flushing only rarely.

Don’t make the mistake of thinking that the toilet tissue is provided for human use. Not only does using the loo roll destroy a very delicate arachnid habitat, but cobwebs all over your privates can be devilishly ticklish.

Filed under: Dos & Don'ts — Clare @ 9:10 am